Isn’t that the truth? Some days I do question what life is trying to teach me. I was just going about my peaceful day, getting in a good workout when a text message from “Seattle” popped onto my phone. “I’ve been thinking so much about you lately.” No. Just, no. It felt like a swift kick to the stomach. Still, after all these years. At least now it’s much easier to shake it off and not let it derail my whole day. I told Seattle no years ago. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But in my heart, I know that it was the right thing to do. Loving someone should not have to hurt that much. I don’t know if I’ve ever loved anyone that was actually good for me. Just once in my life, I’d like that to happen. Is that too much to ask? Probably. And that’s okay, because it has to be okay.
Have you ever thought about what protects our hearts?
Just a cage of rib bones and other various parts.
it’s fairly simple to cut right through the mess,
And to stop the muscle that makes us confess.And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.
July 3, 2015
You have this big, loving heart that makes you so special. One day someone is going to realize that and he’ll be the luckiest man in the world. You’re right, love shouldn’t hurt. You were also right when you walked away from “Seattle”. You are so much lighter and happier now. More you. You’re beautiful, and I just don’t mean that in the physical sense (even though you are gorgeous!!)<3
July 5, 2015
Thank you, sweetheart. You always say the sweetest things to me.
July 5, 2015
Oh, I remember her… Sometimes we need reminders from our past to let us know that we’re in the right place.
July 5, 2015
Kathryn, I’d forgotten that you’d met. You are so very right and reminders from our past. It temporarily upset me, but after I thought about it for a while, I felt so much gratitude (and relief) for where I am now. It’s far from perfect, but I’m working on it.