Roots and Wings

Friday, December 23, 2016 No tags Permalink

My children each year ask me the same question. After thinking about it, I decided I’d give them my real answer:

What do I want for Christmas? I want you. I want you to keep coming around, I want you to bring your kids around, I want you to ask me questions, ask my advice, tell me your problems, ask for my opinion, ask for my help. I want you to come over and rant about your problems, rant about life, whatever. Tell me about your job, your worries, your spouse, your kids. I want you to continue sharing your life with me. Come over and laugh with me, or laugh at me, I don’t care. Hearing you laugh is music to me.

I spent the better part of my life raising you the best way I knew how, and I’m not bragging, but I did a pretty darn good job. Now, give me time to sit back and admire my work, I’m pretty proud of it.

Raid my refrigerator, help yourself, I really don’t mind. In fact, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

I want you to spend your money making a better life for you and your family, I have the things I need. I want to see you happy and healthy. When you ask me what I want for Christmas, I say “nothing” because you’ve already been giving me my gift all year. I want you.

I am bragging, because I think I really did do a good job with my son. He started his Christmas break from work yesterday. He knew that this is always an extremely hectic work week for me, so he surprised me by stopping by my office to say hello and bring me a latte. And earlier this week I had a flat tire, he kept checking on my thought the day,seeing if I needed help or a ride. In short, he thinks of those around him instead of thinking that the world revolves around him.  One day he’s going to make an excellent husband.

One of my favorite photos of him on this day in 2008. I know it wasn’t December 23, 2009 because I was having back surgery on that day and definitely not crawling around on the floor with my camera! 

Last weekend my son and I were spending some time together and I looked at a text on my phone. I said, “Oh good, Matt’s cat food arrived.” Back story, it was a delivery notification from Amazon and Matt is the guy I work for. My son jokingly said, ” Hey, you don’t order cat food for me!”  I replied, A) You don’t have a cat, and B) I raised you to be a competent adult. We both laughed, but it’s true. 😊

Parents who do everything for and coddle their adult children aren’t doing them any favors. Because one day, we won’t be there to take care of them. It’s our #1 job as a parent to teach our children how to take care of themselves. Start them young and gradually. As they learn and grow as children, we are there to catch them if they fall and to continue to teach them.. Even as an adult, he knows that if he needs me, I’m there. But all along I’ve instilled those life skills he needs so he feels confident.

Here’s how I see it: as a parent, it’s our job to discipline our children. No, that does not mean “punish”.  The root of the word discipline is disciple. The noun disciple comes from the Latin word discipulus, which means “student, learner, or follower.” (Can you tell I loved etymology in school?)

Words I live by:

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